Once I was in this relationship with a guy; M whom i thought was sexy cos he loves cats like i do... yep, guys who loves animals are indeed sexy... I felt as if we were made for each other; we had a lot of things in common, our family knew each other plus his aunt is my mother's best friend, we would text one another everysingle day, and he was the one who started planning our future... i was like; "Whooaa... chill will ya?" But he went on and on giving me hopes that we would grow old together, taking turns to clean our cats' poops and knitting sweaters while having our tea with cekodok bilis...
I wasn't sure of our status but I just assumed that we were an item; since we have been seeing each other for quite some time... he would be checking the text messages in my handphone, he would sulk for days if he found 'friendly' messages from other guys plus he would keep on asking who called me if I was on the phone... so... i guessed we were in a relationship; don't you think so? I mean, we are not in high school anymore, we don't need any 'declaration' that we are an item, right? Orang kata, faham-faham sendiri lah...
But then again, i forgot that he is from Mars...
A long lost boyfriend; Az text me at YM one day. The feeling is still there... my heart would skip a beat each time we chat. Az and I were having an on-off relationship... we've had our ups and downs, he had let me down a few times but somehow he was still on my mind every now and then.. hmmm.. I dreamt about him at night and would be looking forward to his text messages every morning after he text me at YM the other day... I told him about M, and he was jealous I guess... and suddenly I felt uncertain about my relationship with M and I was asking myself; am I really in a relationship with this M guy? I mean, yes, we were seeing each other and he would be jealous if i was texting other guys so... am I his girlfriend?
I didn't have the guts to ask M; I mean, malu seh kalau dia kata, "bila pulak kita couple nih?" I couldn't help myself from asking him since Az was back in my life. I needed to know.
I wasn't really into M but it broke my heart when i heard from my mom what M said to his mother (since my mom is a good friend of M's aunt). His mom asked him about us, apparently he said, "kitorang kawan je." I was speecehless. Ke hulu ke hilir selama ni... tapi kawan je rupanya... dok jeles aku meses lelaki lain, kawan je rupanya... ohhh... i made a terribly wrong assumption... would anyone else assume the same? the problem was, he didn't say a word to me. I finally had the guts to ask him about us; whether there was 'US'.
He didn't give me the exact answer. Berdolak - dalih. "Kita kawan-kawan dulu la... sampai masa nanti kita fikir pasal kawin... tapi I x nak U tunggu I.."
So I was the one who decided, " Macam nilah, since U takut nak cakap apa yg U nak ckp, biar i yg ckp... kita kawan biasa je. Mulai hari ni. U x boleh kata apa kalau i kawan dgn lelaki lain... ok?"
M accepted.
I was pissed off, not bcoz he didnt want to commit, but bcoz he didnt tell me earlier about our status. He had given me the idea that we were together but when i asked him , 'Where are we? Where are we going to?', he freaked out. Why didnt he tell me in the first place so that I could move on? I mean, it's not that I want him to propose me at once when he admits that we are an item, i just wanted to know where the relationship is leading to. Men... they are like that. They want you, but they don't want to commit. They dont wanna let you go, cos they need you to be with them when they are tired after working for 12 hours, they need you to listen to their blabbings about work... they made you feel important; but when you want to be important in their life, they would just kick your a**.
Oh well... i wasn't that much into him... I'm hoping the best for Az and I now... I'm trying to understand him but I know I won't. They have the habit of not telling you where they are, they have the habit of "oh, although i didnt call you that much , it doesnt mean that i dont care.."
Afterall, they are from Mars!
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